BODYGUARD Review: Mind-numbing!

No story, no screenplay and no plot – only Salman Khan, and that too, a confused one!

You do not expect a cinematic masterpiece when you walk into a theatre to watch a Salman Khan film, do you? You just go in there to watch Salman Khan, superstar! So whether you want to watch Bodyguard or not would depend on how much of a Salman fan you are and how much of your sanity you are willing to sacrifice. If that is what it is about for you, and you want a couple of hours of entertainment this festive weekend, here’s what’s in store for you.

Bodyguard Lovely Singh (Salman Khan) is called on by Sartaj Rana (Raj Babbar) to guard his daughter Divya (Kareena Kapoor) who is studying in a college in Pune. Divya, who is all set to get married to a mystery man in London, falls in love with Lovely instead. After a series of long-winding incidents and a few over-the-top action sequences, their love story drags on further for a few reels before finally it’s time for a happy ending.

The first half of the film has nothing to offer— neither laughter nor awe. Tsunami Singh (Rajat Rawail), who is meant for comic relief, only manages to evoke frustration. The story sort of comes to life only in the last half-hour, with a couple of twists thrown in, but by now you are too tired to even notice it.

Perhaps director Siddique made the film only to cash in on Salman’s stardom. He puts in his all in this department— a biceps flaunting Salman, a punching Salman, a shirtless Salman and an item boy Salman. What he forgot to do is add some zing to his basic plot and screenplay. Salman should be lauded for his guts to take on such a weak film and his willingness to add his punch to it. And despite it being one of the most mind-numbing films in recent times, it has ‘hit’ written all over it, mainly because of the current Salman euphoria and the timing of its release. And a word of caution for Sallu: You need to stop taking your loyal audiences for granted, before it’s too late. A word of caution for you readers: This Eid, if you want to be entertained by Salman bhai, don’t visit the theatres. Stay at home and rent a DVD of Wanted or Dabanng instead!

Did you like Salman’s ‘Bodyguard’? Tell us!