Is this Rakhi Sawant or a balloon?

Looks like Miss Sawant has been hiding under a rock for too long now – she’s back, but in a newly flabulous shape. Kya khaya, Rakhi?

We could not believe our eyes when we saw a rather large lady standing near us us at a recent filmi event. We rubbed our eyes in disbelief and did a double check before arriving at the definite conclusion that the damsel was Rakhi Sawant!

The motormouth babe was seen hugging almost anybody she could reach, frantically squinting her eyes and pouting her collagen-filled lips to really jhataak effect. And while we all know that Rakhi personifies the gloss, glitter and glamour typical of a Bollywood item girl, this is not the Ms Sawant we knew and so loved for her feisty, glitzy, quote-a-minute dhinchak-ness.

Honestly speaking, nobody can glam it up the way Rakhi does with her high-on-decibels presence. And so when we took a good look at the dhamakedar damsel, we found that she was at least 20 kilos heavier than her usual agile self. What made Rakhi also ‘noteworthy’ was her weirdly done straightened hair, apart from that shimmery outfit into which she had managed to squeeze her balloon-bloated body. The short and tight frock, the red cell phone – and the red bra to match – and the garish make-up was all familiar, her popular image, but the thunder thighs and the multiple waists were not. The odd-looking shoes and the nail-colour only heightened the infamous Rakhi hysteria!

But we must admit that we really missed Rakhi all these months. The likes of Poonam Pandey, Sherlyn Chopra and Veena Mallik have been jostling to rule the space that once truly belonged to the lady who is loud, vulgar, frank and fearless. And now we want Miss Sawant to gear up, get into action and entertain us with her overtly-zestful dancing once more, with that typically Rakhi tadka of bindaas one-liners and those latkas and jhatkas of her sexy kamariya. Are you listening, Ms S?