After leaving everyone in splits by penning down a hilarious acceptance speech for husband Akshay Kumar at the Vogue Beauty Awards, earlier this year, Twinkle Khanna struck back with yet another mind-blowing speech. While accepting her Opinion Maker Of The Year award at the Vogue Women Of The Year on Sunday night, Mrs. Funny Bones chose to share with the audience the 10 things that she's learnt from the last decade. From sanitary napkins, botox, karwa chauth to ageing - Twinkle touched upon all the subjects that our actors usually refrain from talking about at such public events.
Here's her full speech -
1. It's true that we get more comfortable in our skin as we get older but that is also because that poor thing is not as tight as it used to be.
2. We don't need GST on our sanitary pads. What we need instead is an alarm inside it, not a wide breaking one as it would set us on a different path altogether, but an alarm none the less that warns us of imminent over flow and saves us from the 100 trips we make to the bathroom just to check. Now that's a product I could not grudge the GST on.
3. Millions of Indian women fast for their husband's long life on every Karva Chauth. My dear friend who just won an award does immortalize this in his movies (ref to Karan Johar) but I don't think that our 3033 gods are really listening. Because when the mortality charts show up, there are 147 countries above us where their men outlive our good old Indian dudes. So ladies stop because It's clearly not working.
4. It's difficult to befriend your present if you are still quarrelling with your past.
5. God could not be everywhere so he created mothers and the devil could not be everywhere so he created mother-in-laws. Having said that I feel like I am going to be a terrible one.
6. The only thing free in life is bad and vice. Enough said.
7. Botox unfortunately does not make you look younger. It just makes you look like you are a part of a secret alien invasion desperately trying to fit in with the humans.
8. Our satellite only reached Mars because it was called mom. I am certain that if it was called dad it would still be circling the Earth, lost but not willing to ask for directions.
9. Life is but a chance in the game of choice.
10. For centuries women have been looking for a cape but have been given an apron and it's only recently that we have learned how to swing our aprons around. So let it flutter down our backs and let it take to the skies.
Watch Twinkle Khanna's speech right here -
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